Post by photographerbob on Dec 17, 2014 23:47:40 GMT -6
Bob: GOD DAMN IT!
Inside the shared studio apartment of Bob and Johnny, the part time photographer part time wrestler is throwing a fit, tossing stuff and kicking furniture. Being as he doesn't want all the furnishing broke, Johnny tries to calm his roommate down.
Johnny: It isn't that big a deal man. You were on a 3 match win streak before that loss, and you weren't even pinned it was that Lacey broad!
Bob: THAT MAKES IT EVEN WORSE JOHNNY! SHE WAS HUMILIATED AND SHOWN UP, AND I WASN'T THERE TO STOP IT! DO YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS!?
Johnny: That you should find a better partner or stick to singles matches?
For a moment things quit flying, furniture quits getting kicked, and Bob closes his eyes. He takes in a deep breath, before calmly trying to explain the situation to Johnny.
Bob: I was so fucking close Johnny. So close to proving to Lacey I was worth her time. So close to ripping her clothes off and making the best damned home video my camera has ever recorded. So fucking close to ending this god damn dry spell and instead, it all goes up in smoke and I'm back at square fucking one. Hell I might be even further from bedding Lacey than I was when I first started.
Johnny blinks a few times, rubs his fan, then shakes his head no.
Johnny: This entire fit you just threw, was because you don't get to fuck that Lacey chick?
Bob: Yeah, what else would it be about?
Johnny: I don't know, maybe losing a match and thus earning less money? Perhaps dropping further behind in the race to earn a number one contendership for your company's top prize? Hell, you could even be mad that not beating Amy keeps you further away from another shot at the television championship, but this is all about you getting your rocks off to that Lacey chick.
Bob: There is gonna be plenty of time to win matches, plenty of time to win championships Johnny, but pumping Lacey Roberts full of Bob Brooks baby batter has got to have a very small window. I mean seriously, I bet there are atleast fifteen million other guys out there trying to get into her pants just like I am. Hell there is probably even fifteen million women, that is like thirty million competitors trying to beat me to the holy grail. Eventually she's gonna find the one Johnny, the last person to ever twitter her google, the person who gets to spend the rest of their days falling asleep and waking up next to her. It was so close to being me Johnny, I could practically taste her on my tongue.
Johnny begins to walk around the room, picking up whatever things happened to not break while Bob was losing his cool.
Johnny: I'm not trying to tell you how to live your life Bob, but did it ever occur to you that you would be better off focusing on other things?
Bob: Like what? My photography career has pretty much come to a full halt, so now it's pretty much just a fucking hobby.
Johnny: So focus on your wrestling career. You've got a match against four other people coming up. Surely between the four of them there is one that might spark your interest.
Bob: There isn't a person on this planet that holds a candle to miss Lacey Roberts, you expect me to put my eyes on low grade trash when I've been so close to perfection?
Johnny: Fine, focus on yourself, and your own story. This is your chance to start another winning streak, a shot to really show those in charge you belong. Hell it doesn't matter which one you defeat it'll earn you the same amount of points in the chase for the World Championship.
Bob: Who are you kidding Johnny? I'm on the fucking undercard. Nobody gives a rats ass about this match outside of the people involved.
Johnny: That isn't true. The live audience is sure to love the match.
Bob: LIVE AUDIENCE!? We're performing in Colorado Springs. Who gives a flying fuck about Colorado Springs?
Johnny: Fine, if you won't do it for the right reasons then do it for the wrong reasons. Do it for the extra money you get to pocket for winning. Hell maybe you can even spend whatever is left over on some gift for Lacey Roberts. If you can't earn your way back into her good graces you could always try buying your way back.
Bob: Johnny that is...
dramatic pause.
Bob: THE SMARTEST THING YOU'VE EVER SAID! I'M GONNA GO HEAD OUT RIGHT NOW AND LOOK FOR SOMETHING LACEY MIGHT LIKE!
Johnny: Wait why don't you just...
It's clear Bob isn't listening, as he runs right by Johnny and out the door, leaving his roommate home alone.
Johnny: Browse for stuff online.... fucking idiot.
Inside the shared studio apartment of Bob and Johnny, the part time photographer part time wrestler is throwing a fit, tossing stuff and kicking furniture. Being as he doesn't want all the furnishing broke, Johnny tries to calm his roommate down.
Johnny: It isn't that big a deal man. You were on a 3 match win streak before that loss, and you weren't even pinned it was that Lacey broad!
Bob: THAT MAKES IT EVEN WORSE JOHNNY! SHE WAS HUMILIATED AND SHOWN UP, AND I WASN'T THERE TO STOP IT! DO YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS!?
Johnny: That you should find a better partner or stick to singles matches?
For a moment things quit flying, furniture quits getting kicked, and Bob closes his eyes. He takes in a deep breath, before calmly trying to explain the situation to Johnny.
Bob: I was so fucking close Johnny. So close to proving to Lacey I was worth her time. So close to ripping her clothes off and making the best damned home video my camera has ever recorded. So fucking close to ending this god damn dry spell and instead, it all goes up in smoke and I'm back at square fucking one. Hell I might be even further from bedding Lacey than I was when I first started.
Johnny blinks a few times, rubs his fan, then shakes his head no.
Johnny: This entire fit you just threw, was because you don't get to fuck that Lacey chick?
Bob: Yeah, what else would it be about?
Johnny: I don't know, maybe losing a match and thus earning less money? Perhaps dropping further behind in the race to earn a number one contendership for your company's top prize? Hell, you could even be mad that not beating Amy keeps you further away from another shot at the television championship, but this is all about you getting your rocks off to that Lacey chick.
Bob: There is gonna be plenty of time to win matches, plenty of time to win championships Johnny, but pumping Lacey Roberts full of Bob Brooks baby batter has got to have a very small window. I mean seriously, I bet there are atleast fifteen million other guys out there trying to get into her pants just like I am. Hell there is probably even fifteen million women, that is like thirty million competitors trying to beat me to the holy grail. Eventually she's gonna find the one Johnny, the last person to ever twitter her google, the person who gets to spend the rest of their days falling asleep and waking up next to her. It was so close to being me Johnny, I could practically taste her on my tongue.
Johnny begins to walk around the room, picking up whatever things happened to not break while Bob was losing his cool.
Johnny: I'm not trying to tell you how to live your life Bob, but did it ever occur to you that you would be better off focusing on other things?
Bob: Like what? My photography career has pretty much come to a full halt, so now it's pretty much just a fucking hobby.
Johnny: So focus on your wrestling career. You've got a match against four other people coming up. Surely between the four of them there is one that might spark your interest.
Bob: There isn't a person on this planet that holds a candle to miss Lacey Roberts, you expect me to put my eyes on low grade trash when I've been so close to perfection?
Johnny: Fine, focus on yourself, and your own story. This is your chance to start another winning streak, a shot to really show those in charge you belong. Hell it doesn't matter which one you defeat it'll earn you the same amount of points in the chase for the World Championship.
Bob: Who are you kidding Johnny? I'm on the fucking undercard. Nobody gives a rats ass about this match outside of the people involved.
Johnny: That isn't true. The live audience is sure to love the match.
Bob: LIVE AUDIENCE!? We're performing in Colorado Springs. Who gives a flying fuck about Colorado Springs?
Johnny: Fine, if you won't do it for the right reasons then do it for the wrong reasons. Do it for the extra money you get to pocket for winning. Hell maybe you can even spend whatever is left over on some gift for Lacey Roberts. If you can't earn your way back into her good graces you could always try buying your way back.
Bob: Johnny that is...
dramatic pause.
Bob: THE SMARTEST THING YOU'VE EVER SAID! I'M GONNA GO HEAD OUT RIGHT NOW AND LOOK FOR SOMETHING LACEY MIGHT LIKE!
Johnny: Wait why don't you just...
It's clear Bob isn't listening, as he runs right by Johnny and out the door, leaving his roommate home alone.
Johnny: Browse for stuff online.... fucking idiot.