Post by vincejones on Sept 17, 2014 21:43:47 GMT -6
The camera fades in and we see Vince Jones along with his brother, Keshawn Jones and his agent, Reno Banks. Keshawn and Reno trail behind Vince Jones as the make their way down a crowded New York City block together.
Reno Banks: V, I understand that you and your brother wanna get a quick trim and all; but, couldn't we just have gone to my usual place? They do high quality work where I usually go.
Vince continues marching along down the block and just shakes his head in disappointment with Reno. Vince stops in his tracks and turns towards Reno.
Vince Jones: Reno, yo people prolly do pretty well when it comes to their hair and grooming game; but, Jonesy only trusts one spot to take care of all of this.
Vince motions towards his face.
Vince Jones: You think V gonna let just anyone take care of this pretty ass face here?? Nah, son! Besides this fuckin' spot almost like home to V.
Keshawn Jones: Reno, trust us. These guys'll take care of you, man.
Reno Banks: Well, I hope you're right, Vinnie.
Vince Jones: Besides, rememba the last fuckin' time we holla'd at yo people for a trim??
The scene quickly switches to a start of the art barber shop where Vince Jones can be seen relaxing in the barber's chair. He is currently getting his goatee shaped up when all of a sudden the barber taking care of his face begins to chuckle to himself softly.
Barber: Hmmm...looks like uh...I was slightly off on that one. Might have to change this up a little bit here.
Vince's eyes pop open wide and he quickly sits up straight surprising the barber.
Vince Jones: You did what??
Barber: Well, I...
Vince Jones looks straight ahead at the mirror in front of him and he leans forward noticing the slight miscue that was made on his goatee.
Vince Jones: Ahh fuck no!!!
Vince quickly hops out of the chair, whirls around, snatches the barber by the collar, and raises his fist ready to pound his face in.
Vince Jones: How you gonna fuck up V's shit, man? What the fuck is up with that, huh??
The barber looks up at Vince Jones in utter shock as Reno Banks comes running over and tries to pry his client away from the helpless barber as the scene switches back to the present. Reno nods his head in agreement.
Reno Banks: Okay. You've got a point there, champ.
Vince nods and immediately turns his back on Reno and marches onward.
Vince Jones: You damn straight V right about that shit, man!
All of a sudden the three men stop in front of a barber shop with a large pair of clippers posted on its sign. The barber shop is named Miracles and Vince Jones begins smile and nod his head in approval. Reno looks up and still appears to be a bit apprehensive about getting his trim at this barber shop that remains to be foreign to him. Keshawn heartily pats Reno on the back and looks up at the building in admiration.
Keshawn Jones: Reno, you 'bout to be treated to one of the cleanest cuts you've ever had, my man. These cats here got skills like no otha. You gonna be in good hands ,Reno. Lighten up.
Reno Banks: I suppose...
Vince Jones motions for Keshawn and Reno to follow him inside. Keshawn and Reno follow as the three of them enter the building and are greeted by some old school, Wu-Tang playing in the background. The atmosphere is lively with just about all of the barber chairs filled with patrons except for three that are set in a row. A young, hispanic gentleman looks up and spots Vince Jones and his crew. He comes walking across the room with a bright smile on his face and greets Vince with a hug.
Hispanic barber: Jonesy, what up?
Vince Jones: You know what it be, Luis. We here ready for you to do the damn thing, son.
Vince begins caressing his face and smiles and laughs to himself.
Vince Jones: V tryin' to be all tall, dark, and sexy man. Gotta get that trim on, son! You know how it be.
Luis: (nodding) Oh, I know. Well, don't worry. We got you, V! Word is bond.
Vince Jones: No doubt.
Luis: And how my baby girl, Jasmine?
Vince Jones: Jasmine is Jasmine. You know how it is with her...Queen Bee and shit, man.
Luis: (chuckles to himself) Yeah. I know. Just keep in mind that one was supposed to be mine, man. You lucky I keep you lookin' tight. Cuz you let go of that dime piece and I'm swoopin' quick.
Vince Jones stares back at Luis for a moment and the two of them begin laughing outloud together.
Vince Jones: Hey! You know she picked the right one.
Luis reaches over and slaps jokingly slaps Vince Jones on the shoulder.
Luis: Yeah. I supposed. I guess I'll just have to settle for being numbah two. It is what it is.
Luis turns and greets Keshawn Jones with a friendly fist pound.
Luis: And I see we got lil bruh in the house today too, The Last Don. How Layla doing?
Keshawn Jones: She keeping yo man's happy that's fo sho.
Luis and Keshawn nod at one another and begin laughing with one another.
Luis: Well, you Jones boys know how to pick them. I'm a witness to that.
Luis turns and acknowledges Reno who is standing behind the two of them looking rather timid at the moment.
Luis: And who's this guy?
Vince and Keshawn look over their shoulders and smirk at Reno.
Vince Jones: Oh, that guy? Man that's Reno. We brought him along to give him a taste of what a real barber shop is all about, not that foo foo bullshit he accustomed to.
Luis: (nodding) I see. Well, you know you in the right place. Go ahead and take a seat. We'll be with ya in a moment.
Reno, Vince, and Keshawn march across the room to their respective seats and sit down. All of a sudden a young black male seated next to them in a New York Giants jersey greets them with conversation.
Client #1: What up, man?
Vince Jones turns and nods in acknowledgement.
Vince Jones: What up?
Client #1: You local, right??
Vince Jones: (nods his head) New Yawk to the the fullest.
Reno tries his best to get comfortable. Meanwhile the client points up to the t.v where the tail end of some ESPN highlights from the New York Giants game plays.
Client #1: Our boys looking like shit so far this year...
Vince shrugs his shoulders and just shakes his head in disappointment.
Vince Jones: Well, they wanna stick with fuckin' Coughlin and shit! Yeah. The man got us two rings when he was on the hot seat and all; but, his punk ass needs to be kicked to the curb now, man!
Client #1: Hey! You preaching to the choir, dawg! We need Harbaugh!
All of a sudden the Puerto Rican barber who is cutting the guy's hair chimes in.
Puerto Rican barber: Harbaugh?? You smoking crack? How we gettin' him?
Client #1: Its the Big Apple! We can get him here!
Keshawn Jones and Vince look up at the t.v to see ESPN Sportscenter playing and some highlights from the USA in FIBA tournament.
Keshawn Jones: Man, fuck that Lebron James! He goes from Cleveland to Miami and then he goes right back to Cleveland again! I'm sick and damn tired of hearing about that fool! And now K. Love in Cleveland too!
All of a sudden a voice from across the room rings.
Client #1 Yeah! Fuck that Lebron James, bitch!
Client #2: Hey! Hey! Heeeeeey! Lebron James is the greatest to eva play the damn game, man!
Vince Jones hears this and just shakes his head.
Vince Jones: Luis, you betta get ya boys ova here to start takin' care of yo mans and shit before V have to slap that fool across the face ova there for poppin' off with all that Lebron James is the greatest to eva play bullshit! Fuck a Lebron James!
The room all sounds off in unison.
Clients and Barbers: (in unison) Yeah!! Fuck a Lebron James!
Keshawn Jones: Lebron's not Jordan! That's fo damn sho!
All of a sudden the room goes silent for moment and some soft grumbling begins to ring out from all corners of the room. Luis comes walking over as well as two other barbers and the three of them get Vince, Reno, and Keshawn ready to be taken care of.
Vince Jones: Hey yo! You cats gonna have to excuse V's lil bruh here. V beat the shit outta him one too many times when we were small and shit! Now V'll give MJ his props and all; but, that fool robbed Ewing and the Knicks out of how many rings??
Luis nods his head in agreement as he begins inspecting Vince's goatee.
Luis: Too many to even count, V. Way too many to even count. So, we going for the usual here, V?
Vince Jones: Damn straight!
Luis: Aight! I got ya, son.
One of the barbers begins going to work on Keshawn's hair and face as Keshawn begins firing back.
Keshawn Jones: Hey! I can't help it that I went with victory ova constant heartbreak. How many times did my Bulls leave you in yo damn room all pissed off and shit back in the day??
One of the barbers begins to attend to Reno as Vince just glares straight ahead.
Vince Jones: Don't even start with all that bullshit!
Client #3: Where yo Bulls at now, huh? MJ not coming out of retirement to save yo boys! What? You all gonna rely on Derrick Rose to carry you guys all the way this year? We don't even know if the man gonna be able to carry his own damn weight once the season starts.
Barber #2: Man, got a point. Rose has been on the sidelines...
Keshawn Jones: Why we gotta talk about old stuff now?
Client #3: Knicks are comin, son! Knicks are comin' hard with Carmelo and the crew!
Vince Jones: You got that right!
Reno Banks: And what about my Celtics??
All of a sudden the room goes deathly silent as Reno Banks starts nodding his head excited to join the conversation.
The Room: (in unison) Get da fuck outta here with that!
They all start booing Reno emphatically.
Luis: Man, you lucky that my man Trey doesn't cut you off for that comment right there, dude!
Trey the barber stops mid shave on Reno and just shakes his head in disappointment.
Trey: Yeah! This right here is a Boston-free zone! We're not tryin' to hear about those Celtics, those Red Sox, the Boston Marathon or any of that Boston bullshit! You've been warned!
Trey gently taps Reno on the cheek and goes back to work again.
All of a sudden some highlights from the Mayweather/Maidana fight begin playing and Vince Jones laughs to himself.
Vince Jones: Cats all on that Mayweath-ah goin' down bandwagon. So, when the fuckin' man supposed to lose, huh??
Trey: They don't call the man Money Mayweathah for nothin'!
Vince Jones: Hmph! They need to be donnin' V. Jones the same way up in UWA and shit! Cuz this fool ain't goin' nowhere, son! Nowhere!
Keshawn and Vince reaches over and dap each other in agreement.
Keshawn Jones: Damn straight!
Reno Banks: Speaking of all that. We might as well get down to business about your main event match you've got coming up against one of the Kenyon sisters.
Vince grunts in frustration.
Vince Jones: Anoth-ah one of these broads, man! C'mon, Reno! What the fuck is there to discuss? You fought one, you've fought them all! Its gonna be like it usually is! Jonesy walks in and wipes the mat with her damn face and shit! It is what it is! We handled Brody last week with no problems! It's a done deal! On the next one...
Luis: Damn right, V! On to the next, on on to the next one...
Reno Banks: Well, it might not be so simple...
Vince Jones: Why not?
Reno Banks: Ashley Kenyon...
Vince Jones: And?? What the fuck is that supposed to mean? She Wond-uh Woman and shit or somethin'? We talkin' about some superhero broad or somethin' here now?
Reno Banks: Well, not quite; but she and her sister were going head-to-head with The Children...
Vince Jones: And you gonna bring up some fuckin' children?? The bitch beats the asses of a bunch of kids and you gonna start worryin' Jonesy with that shit?? Isn't that what they do? They sit at home and beat some kids asses here and there if they gettin' outta line. So what?
Reno Banks: The Children of Nephilim, Vinnie. Does the name ring a bell?
Vince Jones: Its whateva! Jonesy walks that aisle meets whoeva this Ashley Kenyon bitch is sticks her with the right cross, slaps her with that money make-ah uppercut like Mayweath-ah, pins her, and yells "Show V the mahfuckin' Money!" Simply a done deal!
Reno Banks: If you say so...
Keshawn Jones: My bruh knows so, Reno.
Reno shakes his head.
Reno Banks: I'm hoping that's the case.
Keshawn Jones: You gotta believe! If V says its gonna pass its goin' down, man! So, just chill out! We got this at Mayhem, son!
Client #2: So, you gonna go Ray Rice on a bitch and shit??
Vince Jones just shrugs off the remark.
Reno Banks: Man, would Mayweath-ah have been as hard a client to manage?
Vince Jones: What about Mayweath-ah?
Reno Banks: You may not know this; but, I was in line to represent Mayweath-ah before he really took off in boxing.
Luis: "Money" Mayweather? You bullshittin', man!
Reno Banks: Its true! Its true! I was right there in line and then this otha guy swooped in like a hawk! And so, I ended up with the next best thing...
Vince Jones: And that was?
Reno Banks: (points at Vince) You.
Vince Jones: Next best thing?? Reno, you mean the absolute best...
Trey: Well, you good and all; but, I hate to burst your bubble. Mayweather's loaded, son!
Vince Jones: Whoa, whoa, whoooooa! Hold the phone here on that bullshit!
Luis: Uh....yeah. That's a debate you not winning right there, V. Mayweather hands down has got you stacked and that's only just a little bit of his cash, man.
Keshawn cups his chin in thought and slowly begins nodding his head in agreement as Luis finishes up on Vince's trim.
Keshawn Jones: I gotta agree. You go up in the strip club and make it rain a little. Mayweather shows up and he bringin' a whole fuckin' ocean with him.
Vince Jones: Oh...so its like that?
Keshawn Jones: Yeah! Its like that...
Luis cleans up Vince just a little bit more and pulls off apron from around Vince's neck.
Luis: Well, I think we have you looking good, son! Not Mayweather good; but, you up there...
Vince rolls his eyes at Luis and nods as the barber pats him on the back in a playful manner.
Vince Jones: Yeah...whateva.
Vince rises to his feet and just shakes his head as he looks around the barber shop at everyone assembled around him.
Vince Jones: V betta than fuckin' Mayweath-ah! Jonesy winning his damn match at Mayhem and prove he just as money as that smallish mahfucka is! You best believe that!
Luis: Well, if you that damn money, how about you buy everyone up in this damn barber shop some season tickets to the Knicks games next year! And I'm not talking about the cheap seats! I'm talkin' about the good shit, box seats! Cuz Mayweath-ah got that kind grip, son! He could hook it up like that!
The whole room of clientele and barbers all look at Vince Jones.
The Room: (in unison) Yeah! Hook us up, Money!
Vince Jones looks around at everyone flips them all off.
Vince Jones: Fuck all you bitches! V not buyin' you all you cats a damn thing!
The whole room groans and begins booing Vince at the same time as they all start tossing whatever they can find at Vince in displeasure. Vince shields himself from the attack.
Vince Jones: But V'll win his damn match...
The Room: (in unison) Go the fuck on with that shit!
They all start shaking their heads in disappointment and slowly go back to their arguments over sports and whatnot as the camera slowly fades to black.
Reno Banks: V, I understand that you and your brother wanna get a quick trim and all; but, couldn't we just have gone to my usual place? They do high quality work where I usually go.
Vince continues marching along down the block and just shakes his head in disappointment with Reno. Vince stops in his tracks and turns towards Reno.
Vince Jones: Reno, yo people prolly do pretty well when it comes to their hair and grooming game; but, Jonesy only trusts one spot to take care of all of this.
Vince motions towards his face.
Vince Jones: You think V gonna let just anyone take care of this pretty ass face here?? Nah, son! Besides this fuckin' spot almost like home to V.
Keshawn Jones: Reno, trust us. These guys'll take care of you, man.
Reno Banks: Well, I hope you're right, Vinnie.
Vince Jones: Besides, rememba the last fuckin' time we holla'd at yo people for a trim??
The scene quickly switches to a start of the art barber shop where Vince Jones can be seen relaxing in the barber's chair. He is currently getting his goatee shaped up when all of a sudden the barber taking care of his face begins to chuckle to himself softly.
Barber: Hmmm...looks like uh...I was slightly off on that one. Might have to change this up a little bit here.
Vince's eyes pop open wide and he quickly sits up straight surprising the barber.
Vince Jones: You did what??
Barber: Well, I...
Vince Jones looks straight ahead at the mirror in front of him and he leans forward noticing the slight miscue that was made on his goatee.
Vince Jones: Ahh fuck no!!!
Vince quickly hops out of the chair, whirls around, snatches the barber by the collar, and raises his fist ready to pound his face in.
Vince Jones: How you gonna fuck up V's shit, man? What the fuck is up with that, huh??
The barber looks up at Vince Jones in utter shock as Reno Banks comes running over and tries to pry his client away from the helpless barber as the scene switches back to the present. Reno nods his head in agreement.
Reno Banks: Okay. You've got a point there, champ.
Vince nods and immediately turns his back on Reno and marches onward.
Vince Jones: You damn straight V right about that shit, man!
All of a sudden the three men stop in front of a barber shop with a large pair of clippers posted on its sign. The barber shop is named Miracles and Vince Jones begins smile and nod his head in approval. Reno looks up and still appears to be a bit apprehensive about getting his trim at this barber shop that remains to be foreign to him. Keshawn heartily pats Reno on the back and looks up at the building in admiration.
Keshawn Jones: Reno, you 'bout to be treated to one of the cleanest cuts you've ever had, my man. These cats here got skills like no otha. You gonna be in good hands ,Reno. Lighten up.
Reno Banks: I suppose...
Vince Jones motions for Keshawn and Reno to follow him inside. Keshawn and Reno follow as the three of them enter the building and are greeted by some old school, Wu-Tang playing in the background. The atmosphere is lively with just about all of the barber chairs filled with patrons except for three that are set in a row. A young, hispanic gentleman looks up and spots Vince Jones and his crew. He comes walking across the room with a bright smile on his face and greets Vince with a hug.
Hispanic barber: Jonesy, what up?
Vince Jones: You know what it be, Luis. We here ready for you to do the damn thing, son.
Vince begins caressing his face and smiles and laughs to himself.
Vince Jones: V tryin' to be all tall, dark, and sexy man. Gotta get that trim on, son! You know how it be.
Luis: (nodding) Oh, I know. Well, don't worry. We got you, V! Word is bond.
Vince Jones: No doubt.
Luis: And how my baby girl, Jasmine?
Vince Jones: Jasmine is Jasmine. You know how it is with her...Queen Bee and shit, man.
Luis: (chuckles to himself) Yeah. I know. Just keep in mind that one was supposed to be mine, man. You lucky I keep you lookin' tight. Cuz you let go of that dime piece and I'm swoopin' quick.
Vince Jones stares back at Luis for a moment and the two of them begin laughing outloud together.
Vince Jones: Hey! You know she picked the right one.
Luis reaches over and slaps jokingly slaps Vince Jones on the shoulder.
Luis: Yeah. I supposed. I guess I'll just have to settle for being numbah two. It is what it is.
Luis turns and greets Keshawn Jones with a friendly fist pound.
Luis: And I see we got lil bruh in the house today too, The Last Don. How Layla doing?
Keshawn Jones: She keeping yo man's happy that's fo sho.
Luis and Keshawn nod at one another and begin laughing with one another.
Luis: Well, you Jones boys know how to pick them. I'm a witness to that.
Luis turns and acknowledges Reno who is standing behind the two of them looking rather timid at the moment.
Luis: And who's this guy?
Vince and Keshawn look over their shoulders and smirk at Reno.
Vince Jones: Oh, that guy? Man that's Reno. We brought him along to give him a taste of what a real barber shop is all about, not that foo foo bullshit he accustomed to.
Luis: (nodding) I see. Well, you know you in the right place. Go ahead and take a seat. We'll be with ya in a moment.
Reno, Vince, and Keshawn march across the room to their respective seats and sit down. All of a sudden a young black male seated next to them in a New York Giants jersey greets them with conversation.
Client #1: What up, man?
Vince Jones turns and nods in acknowledgement.
Vince Jones: What up?
Client #1: You local, right??
Vince Jones: (nods his head) New Yawk to the the fullest.
Reno tries his best to get comfortable. Meanwhile the client points up to the t.v where the tail end of some ESPN highlights from the New York Giants game plays.
Client #1: Our boys looking like shit so far this year...
Vince shrugs his shoulders and just shakes his head in disappointment.
Vince Jones: Well, they wanna stick with fuckin' Coughlin and shit! Yeah. The man got us two rings when he was on the hot seat and all; but, his punk ass needs to be kicked to the curb now, man!
Client #1: Hey! You preaching to the choir, dawg! We need Harbaugh!
All of a sudden the Puerto Rican barber who is cutting the guy's hair chimes in.
Puerto Rican barber: Harbaugh?? You smoking crack? How we gettin' him?
Client #1: Its the Big Apple! We can get him here!
Keshawn Jones and Vince look up at the t.v to see ESPN Sportscenter playing and some highlights from the USA in FIBA tournament.
Keshawn Jones: Man, fuck that Lebron James! He goes from Cleveland to Miami and then he goes right back to Cleveland again! I'm sick and damn tired of hearing about that fool! And now K. Love in Cleveland too!
All of a sudden a voice from across the room rings.
Client #1 Yeah! Fuck that Lebron James, bitch!
Client #2: Hey! Hey! Heeeeeey! Lebron James is the greatest to eva play the damn game, man!
Vince Jones hears this and just shakes his head.
Vince Jones: Luis, you betta get ya boys ova here to start takin' care of yo mans and shit before V have to slap that fool across the face ova there for poppin' off with all that Lebron James is the greatest to eva play bullshit! Fuck a Lebron James!
The room all sounds off in unison.
Clients and Barbers: (in unison) Yeah!! Fuck a Lebron James!
Keshawn Jones: Lebron's not Jordan! That's fo damn sho!
All of a sudden the room goes silent for moment and some soft grumbling begins to ring out from all corners of the room. Luis comes walking over as well as two other barbers and the three of them get Vince, Reno, and Keshawn ready to be taken care of.
Vince Jones: Hey yo! You cats gonna have to excuse V's lil bruh here. V beat the shit outta him one too many times when we were small and shit! Now V'll give MJ his props and all; but, that fool robbed Ewing and the Knicks out of how many rings??
Luis nods his head in agreement as he begins inspecting Vince's goatee.
Luis: Too many to even count, V. Way too many to even count. So, we going for the usual here, V?
Vince Jones: Damn straight!
Luis: Aight! I got ya, son.
One of the barbers begins going to work on Keshawn's hair and face as Keshawn begins firing back.
Keshawn Jones: Hey! I can't help it that I went with victory ova constant heartbreak. How many times did my Bulls leave you in yo damn room all pissed off and shit back in the day??
One of the barbers begins to attend to Reno as Vince just glares straight ahead.
Vince Jones: Don't even start with all that bullshit!
Client #3: Where yo Bulls at now, huh? MJ not coming out of retirement to save yo boys! What? You all gonna rely on Derrick Rose to carry you guys all the way this year? We don't even know if the man gonna be able to carry his own damn weight once the season starts.
Barber #2: Man, got a point. Rose has been on the sidelines...
Keshawn Jones: Why we gotta talk about old stuff now?
Client #3: Knicks are comin, son! Knicks are comin' hard with Carmelo and the crew!
Vince Jones: You got that right!
Reno Banks: And what about my Celtics??
All of a sudden the room goes deathly silent as Reno Banks starts nodding his head excited to join the conversation.
The Room: (in unison) Get da fuck outta here with that!
They all start booing Reno emphatically.
Luis: Man, you lucky that my man Trey doesn't cut you off for that comment right there, dude!
Trey the barber stops mid shave on Reno and just shakes his head in disappointment.
Trey: Yeah! This right here is a Boston-free zone! We're not tryin' to hear about those Celtics, those Red Sox, the Boston Marathon or any of that Boston bullshit! You've been warned!
Trey gently taps Reno on the cheek and goes back to work again.
All of a sudden some highlights from the Mayweather/Maidana fight begin playing and Vince Jones laughs to himself.
Vince Jones: Cats all on that Mayweath-ah goin' down bandwagon. So, when the fuckin' man supposed to lose, huh??
Trey: They don't call the man Money Mayweathah for nothin'!
Vince Jones: Hmph! They need to be donnin' V. Jones the same way up in UWA and shit! Cuz this fool ain't goin' nowhere, son! Nowhere!
Keshawn and Vince reaches over and dap each other in agreement.
Keshawn Jones: Damn straight!
Reno Banks: Speaking of all that. We might as well get down to business about your main event match you've got coming up against one of the Kenyon sisters.
Vince grunts in frustration.
Vince Jones: Anoth-ah one of these broads, man! C'mon, Reno! What the fuck is there to discuss? You fought one, you've fought them all! Its gonna be like it usually is! Jonesy walks in and wipes the mat with her damn face and shit! It is what it is! We handled Brody last week with no problems! It's a done deal! On the next one...
Luis: Damn right, V! On to the next, on on to the next one...
Reno Banks: Well, it might not be so simple...
Vince Jones: Why not?
Reno Banks: Ashley Kenyon...
Vince Jones: And?? What the fuck is that supposed to mean? She Wond-uh Woman and shit or somethin'? We talkin' about some superhero broad or somethin' here now?
Reno Banks: Well, not quite; but she and her sister were going head-to-head with The Children...
Vince Jones: And you gonna bring up some fuckin' children?? The bitch beats the asses of a bunch of kids and you gonna start worryin' Jonesy with that shit?? Isn't that what they do? They sit at home and beat some kids asses here and there if they gettin' outta line. So what?
Reno Banks: The Children of Nephilim, Vinnie. Does the name ring a bell?
Vince Jones: Its whateva! Jonesy walks that aisle meets whoeva this Ashley Kenyon bitch is sticks her with the right cross, slaps her with that money make-ah uppercut like Mayweath-ah, pins her, and yells "Show V the mahfuckin' Money!" Simply a done deal!
Reno Banks: If you say so...
Keshawn Jones: My bruh knows so, Reno.
Reno shakes his head.
Reno Banks: I'm hoping that's the case.
Keshawn Jones: You gotta believe! If V says its gonna pass its goin' down, man! So, just chill out! We got this at Mayhem, son!
Client #2: So, you gonna go Ray Rice on a bitch and shit??
Vince Jones just shrugs off the remark.
Reno Banks: Man, would Mayweath-ah have been as hard a client to manage?
Vince Jones: What about Mayweath-ah?
Reno Banks: You may not know this; but, I was in line to represent Mayweath-ah before he really took off in boxing.
Luis: "Money" Mayweather? You bullshittin', man!
Reno Banks: Its true! Its true! I was right there in line and then this otha guy swooped in like a hawk! And so, I ended up with the next best thing...
Vince Jones: And that was?
Reno Banks: (points at Vince) You.
Vince Jones: Next best thing?? Reno, you mean the absolute best...
Trey: Well, you good and all; but, I hate to burst your bubble. Mayweather's loaded, son!
Vince Jones: Whoa, whoa, whoooooa! Hold the phone here on that bullshit!
Luis: Uh....yeah. That's a debate you not winning right there, V. Mayweather hands down has got you stacked and that's only just a little bit of his cash, man.
Keshawn cups his chin in thought and slowly begins nodding his head in agreement as Luis finishes up on Vince's trim.
Keshawn Jones: I gotta agree. You go up in the strip club and make it rain a little. Mayweather shows up and he bringin' a whole fuckin' ocean with him.
Vince Jones: Oh...so its like that?
Keshawn Jones: Yeah! Its like that...
Luis cleans up Vince just a little bit more and pulls off apron from around Vince's neck.
Luis: Well, I think we have you looking good, son! Not Mayweather good; but, you up there...
Vince rolls his eyes at Luis and nods as the barber pats him on the back in a playful manner.
Vince Jones: Yeah...whateva.
Vince rises to his feet and just shakes his head as he looks around the barber shop at everyone assembled around him.
Vince Jones: V betta than fuckin' Mayweath-ah! Jonesy winning his damn match at Mayhem and prove he just as money as that smallish mahfucka is! You best believe that!
Luis: Well, if you that damn money, how about you buy everyone up in this damn barber shop some season tickets to the Knicks games next year! And I'm not talking about the cheap seats! I'm talkin' about the good shit, box seats! Cuz Mayweath-ah got that kind grip, son! He could hook it up like that!
The whole room of clientele and barbers all look at Vince Jones.
The Room: (in unison) Yeah! Hook us up, Money!
Vince Jones looks around at everyone flips them all off.
Vince Jones: Fuck all you bitches! V not buyin' you all you cats a damn thing!
The whole room groans and begins booing Vince at the same time as they all start tossing whatever they can find at Vince in displeasure. Vince shields himself from the attack.
Vince Jones: But V'll win his damn match...
The Room: (in unison) Go the fuck on with that shit!
They all start shaking their heads in disappointment and slowly go back to their arguments over sports and whatnot as the camera slowly fades to black.