Post by photographerbob on Jun 13, 2014 2:45:44 GMT -6
Bob Brooks:Shit, stay, don't move, stay, good girl.
We arrive inside Bob Brook's studio apartment back in Hollywood, California. He is currently working his second job, but the target for his camera isn't exactly a client he'd prefer. His attention was focused on Peaches, a small pure bred poodle that currently sits on his couch inside his studio apartment. It took him what felt like forever to get the dog up there and to calm down, so obviously as soon as he did his phone rang and ruined the moment. Bob juggles a camera in one hand, and his phone in the other, as the name "Sam Johnson" appears on the screen. Unchained Wrestling Alliance's head of talent wasn't somebody Bob planned on ignoring. Sammy always treated Bob with respect, and more important than that, Sam might be calling with information about an upcoming paying gig. So Bob answers the phone, all while trying to measure the perfect photo for Peaches.
Bob Brooks:Hey Sammy, what is going on man. Didn't expect you to ring me so shortly after the last show. What's shaking man?
While Sam replies Bob focuses a bit more attention on capturing Peaches in the best possible manner. The lighting, angle, and overall atmosphere all had to be perfect. It didn't help that Peaches refused to sit still, or look in the same direction for more than a second or two at a time. Bob lets out of a huff of frustration, but refuses to give up, constantly shuffling his feet and repositioning himself hoping to capture something worthy of the Bob Brooks name.
Bob Brooks:Don't sweat it man, I mean sure I was bitter after the loss, mainly because it came at the hands of the Mancunian meathead, but ya know, I'm pretty happy with my overall performance. I mean check this out Sammy, so the show is over right, and I'm ready to get the hell out of Utah because ya know, the place is about as entertaining as watching paint dry. So I'm rushing back to the parking lot and this kid, can't be any older than nine or so runs up to me and starts yelling at me. My first impression is this little snob lost his parents and is hoping I could help him out, but the kid actually recognized me from the show and wanted to my autograph. So ya know, loss or not, I atleast won over one little kid.
For a split moment, Peaches looks up and the light hits him at just the right angle for their to be a sort of aura emitting around him. The dog looks nothing short of magnificent, and Bob's eyes light up as he drops to one knee. He goes to capture the moment, just another second, but the dog sneezes in mid shot and ruins everything. So close.
Bob Brooks:I know right. Last week a little kid, maybe next week it's an old lady. Moving on up in the world Sammy. Speaking of which, what are the plans for the next show? Am I getting a rematch against the ole drunken bar owner?
Peaches starts to scratch it's ear, sending a bit of fur flying around which is totally ruining the vibe.
Bob Brooks:Psst, knock it off. Not you Sammy, you keep talkin. You tellin me the ole Mancunian moron isn't even booked for the next show. See it's like I say, it ain't just about winning and losing, it's how ya do it. People didn't leave middle of fucking nowhere Utah last show remembering that the Mancunian muff muncher getting his hand raised. It was all Bobby Brooks who captured their interest like they were all caught in the sight of my camera lens. Wait, I do have a match booked this next set of shows right? I mean not that I don't have some gigs on the side, but I could totally use the income Sammy, California living costs ain't cheap.
A smile from Bob signals he's getting good news on the phone, which is about all the good news he is getting. Peaches may or may not have fleas, as the dog begins to chew on it's own ass. Bob somehow manages to snap his fingers while holding a phone in one hand and his camera in the other. Multitasking isn't anything new to Bob Brooks though, I mean for fuck sake the guy juggles two jobs, and he tries to improve on his video recording skills while in the ring improving his wrestling skills. Never a moments rest for ole Bobby, who might actually be getting somewhere with Peaches, as he stares her down almost like he's using some form of Jedi mind tricks to get the dog to stand still.
Bob Brooks:Jay Shades, yeah I think I've heard of the cat. Thought he was supposed to be on that card last week, but I don't remember seeing him there. Anyways he is on some sort of winning streak right?
This could be it, with both hands currently occupied Bob is left with no choice but to blow as hard as he can at the dog to get it's attention, as well as using the power of breath to push the dogs fur where he wants it to be. At this point if the apartment caught on fire, it's likely Bob would burn before admitting he isn't going to get the shot he wants.
Bob Brooks:No man, not intimidated in the least Sammy. You could throw me in there with the champ and I wouldn't back down. I mean I might get my ass handed to me, but if I were to go down you can beat your ass I'd go down swinging. So I got the when and the who figured out, just tell me where I gotta be and I'll be sure to show up and give the fans a few more moments worth capturing.
AT LAST! Peaches is striking the right pose, with the right lighting, perfect shadows in the background, all the stray fur from before is gone. Bob holds his breath, he drops down practically laying on his stomach to get the angle he wants, then you hear it. Click. He's done it, inside his head there are fireworks blasting while a parade of half naked chicks pull giant Macy Day Parade balloons singing "you're the best around" by Joe Esposito. Then just like that, Sammy crushes all the goodness from Bob's day dream by telling him where the next show takes place.
Bob Brooks:Utah again!? Are you fucking kidding me Sammy!? There is literally nothing to do in Utah. I mean those bastards have a basketball team called the Jazz right. I spent three whole days looking for a good Jazz place last visit, and guess what Sammy? THERE WASN'T ONE!
Photographer Bob sits up from the floor, exhausted from hit battle against the formidable foe named Peaches.
Bob Brooks:Don't worry Sammy I'll be there, just don't expect me to show up early, or ya know, stay any later than I absolutely have to. Moment my match is done my ass is headed for the car and headed back to the good ole Californ-i-ay. Take care Sammy. You too man. Bye.
He hangs up the phone, lets out a sigh of relief, then he hears it, something leaking. It's similar to a leaky water faucet, except it isn't a water faucet, it's that damn dog Peaches, and it's pissing all over Bob's couch.
Bob Brooks:SON OF A BITCH!
We will end this segment with that oddly appropriate burst of outrage, before fading in to show a new scene. This go around Bob is standing in front of a blank white screen, probably used for his more basic photography sessions like high school year book pictures of something. Anyways Bob is currently dressed in his wrestling attire, as that is what he thinks is appropriate to wear while addressing his opponent for the upcoming match.
Bob Brooks:Jay Shades, brother man, dude, homie, pal, I am about to give you exactly what you've been asking for, nay, begging for during the last few weeks. Ya see Jay-dog, you been telling everyone who will listen that you deserve some respect, and week in and week out you step into that ring, and your stand across from a man who offers you none, zip, nada. Consider your luck changed my man, because if there is one thing Bobby Brooks absolutely has to give you as of late, it's respect. I mean look at the facts Jay, you on a roll, what are you up to, three wins in a row now? Seriously man you are about as hot as anyone else in the company right now, and even the queen bee sitting at the top of the heap would be foolish to underestimate you right now. So just to help satiate your hunger for respect Mr. Shades, let me lay it down as simple as I can for ya. I respect what ya done so far in the company, and I respect what you are capable of doing in the future.
If it sounds like Bobby is talking in a different tone or accent then he usually does, it's probably because he is. For whatever reason Bobby seems to be trying real hard to sound hip and cool as if he were a rock star or a street thug. It all comes off pretty fake, but his respect towards his opponent seems genuine.
Bob Brooks:That said Jay my man, if I'm a give props to what you've done lately and where you at now, I gotta be sure to remind you and everyone else exactly where it is you came from. Ya see it ain't always been sunshine and unicorns for you home skillet. Once upon a time Jay Shades made his debut in Unchained Wrestling Alliance and he ran into a sweet little thing called Skylar. Now on the that night fate would have it that Sky would be victorious, and that Jay Shades would be greeted to the company with the bitter taste of a loss. This ain't me player hatin homie, just spittin the facts. For those who don't know, Sky is as vicious as she is beautiful, and I know there ain't a cat on the planet who would dare try to deny that Sky is scorchin hot. Here is the thing Jay, even in that match, a match that ended with you losing, there were moments in it where you shined. Moments where you captured the attention of everyone watching, and moments that proved that Jay Shades isn't just some scrub off the streets here to make good lookin ladies look even better. No, on that night Shades even through the wrong end of an ass whoopin you managed to show everyone watching that Jay Shades was somebody worth keepin an eye on.
Is there a point to this history lesson and borderline brown nosing? You bet there is!
Bob Brooks:I look at you Jay, and beneath the style and swagger, beneath the brash attitude and blinding confidence, I see a little bit of myself. It ain't no secret that I too, was greeted by this company with a tough loss. I got my ass beat homie, got it beat two ways from Sunday. Thing is Jay, I believe that during my time in the ring, between the opening and closing bell, I showed that I belong. I believe that even in the pit of defeat I managed to shine a tiny glimpse of greatness. More than that Jay, I believe that given another opportunity, another chance, I could shine even brighter. You, my brother from another mother, are that second opportunity. You are the first step towards redemption, the next chapter in the book of Bob, and the first victim to fall prey, to a trademarked Bob Brooks beatdown. Ya see Jay, you and I, we're walking a parallel path. We start the road a little rigid, but as time goes on people will realize that you and I, we're diamonds in the rough. You've built some momentum Jay, but Monday night I'm a put a stop to it while I start some momentum of my own. You and I gonna tear the house down, do it like it ain't ever been done before, but this go around, it's gonna be my hand raised high at the finish line. I start my winning streak, I start getting my respect, and I owe it all to you. So enjoy the moment Jay, and look forward to the moments that are yet to come. And if you are very, very lucky, I'll capture the best of them on my camera and send you a copy to show your grand kids one day. In the meanwhile Jay, try not to be so angry all the time, because you're gonna need that anger Monday Night, when your coping with a loss.
As awful as this video has been so far, Bob ends it in the worst way possible, with a simultaneous wink and flashing of the peace sign. The camera then fades to black, the last thing you see being a big toothy grin from Photographer Bob Brooks.
We arrive inside Bob Brook's studio apartment back in Hollywood, California. He is currently working his second job, but the target for his camera isn't exactly a client he'd prefer. His attention was focused on Peaches, a small pure bred poodle that currently sits on his couch inside his studio apartment. It took him what felt like forever to get the dog up there and to calm down, so obviously as soon as he did his phone rang and ruined the moment. Bob juggles a camera in one hand, and his phone in the other, as the name "Sam Johnson" appears on the screen. Unchained Wrestling Alliance's head of talent wasn't somebody Bob planned on ignoring. Sammy always treated Bob with respect, and more important than that, Sam might be calling with information about an upcoming paying gig. So Bob answers the phone, all while trying to measure the perfect photo for Peaches.
Bob Brooks:Hey Sammy, what is going on man. Didn't expect you to ring me so shortly after the last show. What's shaking man?
While Sam replies Bob focuses a bit more attention on capturing Peaches in the best possible manner. The lighting, angle, and overall atmosphere all had to be perfect. It didn't help that Peaches refused to sit still, or look in the same direction for more than a second or two at a time. Bob lets out of a huff of frustration, but refuses to give up, constantly shuffling his feet and repositioning himself hoping to capture something worthy of the Bob Brooks name.
Bob Brooks:Don't sweat it man, I mean sure I was bitter after the loss, mainly because it came at the hands of the Mancunian meathead, but ya know, I'm pretty happy with my overall performance. I mean check this out Sammy, so the show is over right, and I'm ready to get the hell out of Utah because ya know, the place is about as entertaining as watching paint dry. So I'm rushing back to the parking lot and this kid, can't be any older than nine or so runs up to me and starts yelling at me. My first impression is this little snob lost his parents and is hoping I could help him out, but the kid actually recognized me from the show and wanted to my autograph. So ya know, loss or not, I atleast won over one little kid.
For a split moment, Peaches looks up and the light hits him at just the right angle for their to be a sort of aura emitting around him. The dog looks nothing short of magnificent, and Bob's eyes light up as he drops to one knee. He goes to capture the moment, just another second, but the dog sneezes in mid shot and ruins everything. So close.
Bob Brooks:I know right. Last week a little kid, maybe next week it's an old lady. Moving on up in the world Sammy. Speaking of which, what are the plans for the next show? Am I getting a rematch against the ole drunken bar owner?
Peaches starts to scratch it's ear, sending a bit of fur flying around which is totally ruining the vibe.
Bob Brooks:Psst, knock it off. Not you Sammy, you keep talkin. You tellin me the ole Mancunian moron isn't even booked for the next show. See it's like I say, it ain't just about winning and losing, it's how ya do it. People didn't leave middle of fucking nowhere Utah last show remembering that the Mancunian muff muncher getting his hand raised. It was all Bobby Brooks who captured their interest like they were all caught in the sight of my camera lens. Wait, I do have a match booked this next set of shows right? I mean not that I don't have some gigs on the side, but I could totally use the income Sammy, California living costs ain't cheap.
A smile from Bob signals he's getting good news on the phone, which is about all the good news he is getting. Peaches may or may not have fleas, as the dog begins to chew on it's own ass. Bob somehow manages to snap his fingers while holding a phone in one hand and his camera in the other. Multitasking isn't anything new to Bob Brooks though, I mean for fuck sake the guy juggles two jobs, and he tries to improve on his video recording skills while in the ring improving his wrestling skills. Never a moments rest for ole Bobby, who might actually be getting somewhere with Peaches, as he stares her down almost like he's using some form of Jedi mind tricks to get the dog to stand still.
Bob Brooks:Jay Shades, yeah I think I've heard of the cat. Thought he was supposed to be on that card last week, but I don't remember seeing him there. Anyways he is on some sort of winning streak right?
This could be it, with both hands currently occupied Bob is left with no choice but to blow as hard as he can at the dog to get it's attention, as well as using the power of breath to push the dogs fur where he wants it to be. At this point if the apartment caught on fire, it's likely Bob would burn before admitting he isn't going to get the shot he wants.
Bob Brooks:No man, not intimidated in the least Sammy. You could throw me in there with the champ and I wouldn't back down. I mean I might get my ass handed to me, but if I were to go down you can beat your ass I'd go down swinging. So I got the when and the who figured out, just tell me where I gotta be and I'll be sure to show up and give the fans a few more moments worth capturing.
AT LAST! Peaches is striking the right pose, with the right lighting, perfect shadows in the background, all the stray fur from before is gone. Bob holds his breath, he drops down practically laying on his stomach to get the angle he wants, then you hear it. Click. He's done it, inside his head there are fireworks blasting while a parade of half naked chicks pull giant Macy Day Parade balloons singing "you're the best around" by Joe Esposito. Then just like that, Sammy crushes all the goodness from Bob's day dream by telling him where the next show takes place.
Bob Brooks:Utah again!? Are you fucking kidding me Sammy!? There is literally nothing to do in Utah. I mean those bastards have a basketball team called the Jazz right. I spent three whole days looking for a good Jazz place last visit, and guess what Sammy? THERE WASN'T ONE!
Photographer Bob sits up from the floor, exhausted from hit battle against the formidable foe named Peaches.
Bob Brooks:Don't worry Sammy I'll be there, just don't expect me to show up early, or ya know, stay any later than I absolutely have to. Moment my match is done my ass is headed for the car and headed back to the good ole Californ-i-ay. Take care Sammy. You too man. Bye.
He hangs up the phone, lets out a sigh of relief, then he hears it, something leaking. It's similar to a leaky water faucet, except it isn't a water faucet, it's that damn dog Peaches, and it's pissing all over Bob's couch.
Bob Brooks:SON OF A BITCH!
We will end this segment with that oddly appropriate burst of outrage, before fading in to show a new scene. This go around Bob is standing in front of a blank white screen, probably used for his more basic photography sessions like high school year book pictures of something. Anyways Bob is currently dressed in his wrestling attire, as that is what he thinks is appropriate to wear while addressing his opponent for the upcoming match.
Bob Brooks:Jay Shades, brother man, dude, homie, pal, I am about to give you exactly what you've been asking for, nay, begging for during the last few weeks. Ya see Jay-dog, you been telling everyone who will listen that you deserve some respect, and week in and week out you step into that ring, and your stand across from a man who offers you none, zip, nada. Consider your luck changed my man, because if there is one thing Bobby Brooks absolutely has to give you as of late, it's respect. I mean look at the facts Jay, you on a roll, what are you up to, three wins in a row now? Seriously man you are about as hot as anyone else in the company right now, and even the queen bee sitting at the top of the heap would be foolish to underestimate you right now. So just to help satiate your hunger for respect Mr. Shades, let me lay it down as simple as I can for ya. I respect what ya done so far in the company, and I respect what you are capable of doing in the future.
If it sounds like Bobby is talking in a different tone or accent then he usually does, it's probably because he is. For whatever reason Bobby seems to be trying real hard to sound hip and cool as if he were a rock star or a street thug. It all comes off pretty fake, but his respect towards his opponent seems genuine.
Bob Brooks:That said Jay my man, if I'm a give props to what you've done lately and where you at now, I gotta be sure to remind you and everyone else exactly where it is you came from. Ya see it ain't always been sunshine and unicorns for you home skillet. Once upon a time Jay Shades made his debut in Unchained Wrestling Alliance and he ran into a sweet little thing called Skylar. Now on the that night fate would have it that Sky would be victorious, and that Jay Shades would be greeted to the company with the bitter taste of a loss. This ain't me player hatin homie, just spittin the facts. For those who don't know, Sky is as vicious as she is beautiful, and I know there ain't a cat on the planet who would dare try to deny that Sky is scorchin hot. Here is the thing Jay, even in that match, a match that ended with you losing, there were moments in it where you shined. Moments where you captured the attention of everyone watching, and moments that proved that Jay Shades isn't just some scrub off the streets here to make good lookin ladies look even better. No, on that night Shades even through the wrong end of an ass whoopin you managed to show everyone watching that Jay Shades was somebody worth keepin an eye on.
Is there a point to this history lesson and borderline brown nosing? You bet there is!
Bob Brooks:I look at you Jay, and beneath the style and swagger, beneath the brash attitude and blinding confidence, I see a little bit of myself. It ain't no secret that I too, was greeted by this company with a tough loss. I got my ass beat homie, got it beat two ways from Sunday. Thing is Jay, I believe that during my time in the ring, between the opening and closing bell, I showed that I belong. I believe that even in the pit of defeat I managed to shine a tiny glimpse of greatness. More than that Jay, I believe that given another opportunity, another chance, I could shine even brighter. You, my brother from another mother, are that second opportunity. You are the first step towards redemption, the next chapter in the book of Bob, and the first victim to fall prey, to a trademarked Bob Brooks beatdown. Ya see Jay, you and I, we're walking a parallel path. We start the road a little rigid, but as time goes on people will realize that you and I, we're diamonds in the rough. You've built some momentum Jay, but Monday night I'm a put a stop to it while I start some momentum of my own. You and I gonna tear the house down, do it like it ain't ever been done before, but this go around, it's gonna be my hand raised high at the finish line. I start my winning streak, I start getting my respect, and I owe it all to you. So enjoy the moment Jay, and look forward to the moments that are yet to come. And if you are very, very lucky, I'll capture the best of them on my camera and send you a copy to show your grand kids one day. In the meanwhile Jay, try not to be so angry all the time, because you're gonna need that anger Monday Night, when your coping with a loss.
As awful as this video has been so far, Bob ends it in the worst way possible, with a simultaneous wink and flashing of the peace sign. The camera then fades to black, the last thing you see being a big toothy grin from Photographer Bob Brooks.